That Crazy Kind: of love Read online

  That Crazy Kind

  of love

  Jenika Snow

  THAT CRAZY KIND... of love

  By Jenika Snow

  www.JenikaSnow.com

  [email protected]

  Copyright © June 2020 by Jenika Snow

  Photographer: Wander Aguiar

  Cover Model: Andrew Biernat

  Image provided by: Wander Book Club

  Cover design by: Lori Jackson

  Editor: Kayla Robichaux

  ALL RIGHTS RESERVED: The unauthorized reproduction, transmission, or distribution of any part of this copyrighted work is illegal. Criminal copyright infringement is investigated by the FBI and is punishable by up to five years in federal prison and a fine of $250,000.

  This literary work is fiction. Any name, places, characters and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or establishments is solely coincidental.

  Please respect the author and do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials that would violate the author’s rights.

  Contents

  Synopsis

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Epilogue

  About the Author

  I wasn’t a jock, wasn’t the pretty boy next door. My family didn’t have any wealth, so I was “that guy from the wrong side of the tracks.”

  I got into too much trouble, too many fights.

  I would have been classified as the bad boy, the guy your mother warned you about.

  And when I transferred to Silver Creek High to finish my senior year, I had one goal—keep my head down, don’t let anyone piss me off enough to get into a fight, and graduate.

  And then she came into my life.

  Harlow.

  She was the prettiest girl I’d ever seen, with her shy glances at me, her questions that delved deep. She was the one person, aside from my own mother, who cared about what I thought and how I felt.

  I knew keeping her as mine probably wasn’t smart, because she was far too good for the likes of me. But no one would have her but me.

  I felt that too strongly to ignore.

  I probably shouldn’t have embraced my feelings for Harlow. She was better off without me. But I was too selfish.

  I wanted her too much.

  So screw it.

  What I felt for her was that crazy kind of love.

  Chapter One

  Harlow

  He wasn’t one of those boys next door. I doubt he’d ever been called gentle or sweet. He was rough around the edges, his voice deep and gruff. I had no doubt he’d even been called a little bit crazy.

  And for some reason, I was transfixed by him.

  Aiden Graft.

  He’d been the new kid at school last month, his identity shrouded in mystery, because he was a loner, kept to himself, and seemed perfectly content with that. He seemed like he had a chip on his shoulder and wore a perpetual scowl on his hard-set face. I wondered if he harbored secrets. And if he did, I doubt anyone would ever find out what they were.

  For the last month, I’d watched him from afar, this gorgeous solitary boy who everyone gave a wide berth. It was like they knew he was dangerous. He certainly looked like he had the ability to beat the shit out of someone without even breaking a sweat.

  I wanted to figure him out, to see what made him tick.

  I wanted to know who he was... who he really was.

  I braced my elbows on the table and stared at him from across the cafeteria. He was always alone, but he seemed completely content with that. He sat in the corner of the room, everyone around him loud and obnoxious, always moving, always active.

  But he was still, relaxed, like the world turned at his pace.

  He was leaned back in his chair, his leg propped up on the seat in front of him. There was a bottle of water, an apple, and a protein bar sitting on the table before him. And he was alone, only two people seated at the far end, as if they were afraid to get any closer.

  And every day, I watched as he read a book during lunch. It was always a new one, as if he devoured the one the day before and was hungry for more.

  And I found that so attractive.

  Just looking at him, how he dressed, how anti-social he was, you’d assume he was some unintelligent punk. I knew a lot of people thought that, saw him as dangerous. But I looked past all that.

  I noticed a couple jocks walk past his table, glancing at Aiden and murmuring to each other before they chuckled.

  Idiots. They were all idiots.

  I knew everybody at school was curious about Aiden, wondering why he didn’t care to join one of the cliques, why he seemed far older than any other senior at school. He wore a leather jacket, a white T-shirt underneath. His jeans were slightly loose, with a distressed look to them. His outfit had me picturing Aiden working on a Harley.

  I didn’t even know if he owned a motorcycle, but he looked like he would, especially with that leather jacket. And I found that arousing as well.

  Who was I kidding? I found everything about Aiden attractive.

  “Harlow, why don’t you just go talk to him?”

  I snapped my head in Pixie’s direction. My best friend since elementary school had a bag of chips in one hand, her other hand digging around inside before she pulled out one of the fried pieces of potato.

  She shoved that chip into her mouth, her expression a little bit expectant as she waited for me to respond.

  “What are you talking about?” I played dumb, obviously. Oh, I knew what she was talking about, because it’s not like I was trying to be secretive in my obsession with Aiden. But I’m not sure how I felt about her calling me out.

  She lifted an eyebrow like she couldn’t believe I was trying to play it off that way. “Girl, who do you think you’re talking to? You know exactly what I’m referring to.” She tipped her chin in Aiden’s direction, and I couldn’t stop myself from glancing over at him.

  I felt my heart jump into my throat when I saw him looking right at me. Or maybe he was just staring in my vicinity? Either way, my body reacted.

  I looked away quickly and cleared my throat, staring at my lunch. I wasn’t hungry, but I started to pick at my peanut butter and jelly sandwich, wanting something to keep me occupied, because I could still feel his focus on me.

  “I’m just curious about him is all,” I said softly and turned my attention to Pixie. The fall of my dark hair made a curtain that had me feeling a semblance of security, like I wasn’t under a microscope right now. I felt like it hid my feelings for Aiden, even if I didn’t know what those feelings were.

  She didn’t say anything as she started to talk with one of the other girls at the table, clearly forgetting about calling me out for being a creep where Aiden was concerned. And I found myself looking at him again.

  I couldn’t help myself.

  He was back to reading his book, his apple in hand. I could imagine sitting beside him and watching as he took a bite, his straight, white teeth digging into the skin, the crack of the flesh breaking resounding in the cafeteria.

  God, my infatuation with him which, if I’m being completely honest, was how I was starting to feel, was making me go insane. I felt like his mysterious persona, the fact that no one really knew who he
is, drew me to him so much.

  And despite what I wanted or what I’d like to do, I was too shy to actually go up to him and introduce myself.

  It all sounded so immature, but being an eighteen-year-old virgin, who hadn’t been more than kissed in her lifetime, the prospect of taking what I wanted, going after it... terrified me.

  Chapter Two

  Aiden

  I felt her gaze on me. I always did, if I let myself be honest.

  Harlow Bradshaw.

  I knew nothing about her on a personal level, but I watched and listened. I found out her name by doing just that, knew who she was. Senior, eighteen years old. I kept to myself, but that didn’t mean I was oblivious to the shit going on around me.

  I normally don’t like people watching me, which they do, because they have assumptions about me. I keep to myself and am quiet. I don’t conform to how everyone else is, how they dress or act. But with her, Harlow Bradshaw, I feel myself liking her watching me. Because when I’ve caught her gazing at me, there’s no expectation or some shit on her face. There’s no judgment. She looks curious about me, like she’s got so much to say, like she’s got so much she wants to find out.

  And for the past month, since I transferred here, I told myself I wasn’t going to get into any trouble. And that included getting involved with anyone. I didn’t need the drama, didn’t need the complication.

  I had one more year of school left and then I could focus on moving away, being by myself. I knew there were questions and assumptions about me, rumors on who I really was. It wasn’t like there was some kind of huge secret that revolved around me. I had demons, family drama, of course, and if they wanted to think it was this massive mystery, I went right ahead and let them. It didn’t matter, because I didn’t give a shit. But then there was her, the feel of her watching me, knowing she was curios. And I didn’t feel pissed or unaffected.

  I felt… interested in her.

  If she knew the type of guy I was, the life I led, what I didn’t have in my life compared to all these other little assholes who were around us, she probably wouldn’t be interested in me. I knew her curiosity was because I was the new guy, maybe even because I had this secret air around me.

  But shit, I was a nobody.

  There was no big mystery. I came from a poor family, a single mother who was diagnosed with breast cancer three years ago. My childhood was rough, especially at school. I had to fight to survive. Hell, I’d been held back twice because of how much school I’d missed, since I’d stayed home to help take care of my mom, help put food on the table and a roof over our heads.

  Here I was, nearly twenty years old and a senior in high school. I was the shiny new thing, no doubt. But as I looked at her, I felt something else... this curiosity. Girls had never really interested me, not in the way that had me needing them in my life for communication or pleasure.

  At school, I didn’t worry about anyone but myself. I kept my head down, minded my own fucking business. It was better that way. I couldn’t get in anymore trouble if I followed those rules. Hell, I couldn’t even miss anymore school, or it would fuck up any chance I had at going to a decent college and making something out of myself.

  But I had something that always fucked me over. And that was my damn short fuse. That meant I couldn’t just keep my mouth shut if someone fucked with me.

  I had to fuck with them right back.

  Then that would lead to a fist fight, and then that would end with a suspension. Hell, I was probably one infraction away from being expelled and having no chance of actually graduating.

  So I ignored her as best as I could.

  I looked down at the book in my hand, just a moment ago immersed in what I was reading, but I felt her watching me. I always felt her eyes on me. It was this strange sensation, one that I... liked. In fact, I was surprised at how much I enjoyed her staring at me.

  The bell rang, and everyone started gathering their shit to leave the cafeteria. I waited until the room was nearly empty, not wanting to deal with anyone as I made my way to my next class. After standing and grabbing my notebooks, I made my way out and down the main hallway that led to the stairs. They’d take me to the upper level where my algebra class was.

  I heard them bullshitting before I saw them, their voices animated as they talked about the football game coming up.

  The fucking jocks.

  And then I saw them, four guys wearing their letterman jackets and leaning against the walls in the common area.

  “Dude, I’m so fucking Michelle this weekend after the game.”

  They all started laughing.

  “I’m going to see if she’ll let me fuck her in the ass.”

  Another round of laughter echoed off the walls, and I gritted my teeth. I’d never been a fan of when guys bragged about banging a chick, as if they had no fucking respect for the person they’d just been intimate with. It enraged me, if I were being honest. It made me want to beat their assess on principle alone.

  The laughter and conversation slowly died down as I rounded the corner. I knew they saw me then, but I kept my books tucked under my arm, my free hand shoved in the front pocket of my jeans, and left my head lowered.

  I could feel them staring at me, knew they had something to say, but I said a silent prayer to whoever was fucking listening that they kept their damn mouths shut.

  “Hey, new guy,” one of them called out, and I looked at him even though I should have ignored his ass. “Yeah, you.” His mouth was pursed tightly as he pushed off the wall. “It’s Aiden, right?”

  I gave him a chin lift as my answer, not bothering to actually say anything. He knew what my fucking name was. He was just prying. I could see on his expression he wanted to be a cocky asshole in front of his friends. He was probably two seconds away from saying some smart-ass comment that would most likely have my patience snapping and me knocking his teeth in.

  Which was the last thing I needed, and which was also why I kept on walking. They could think I was being a pussy and didn’t want to confront them, but they’d be wrong. I was doing them a damn favor.

  “You don’t talk much,” another guy said as I started moving past them.

  “Do you think you’re too good for us, for the school?” a third one asked.

  I clenched my jaw, feeling my irritation grow.

  “Or maybe he’s a mute. Maybe he’s got a speech impediment and stutters.”

  They all started laughing, which was what really fucking pissed me off. Even if I had a speech impediment, they thought that shit was funny? So I found myself stopping, pulled my free hand out for my pocket, and curled it into a tight fist at my side. I felt my spine straighten, my muscles tense.

  Don’t do it, Aiden. Keep on fucking walking.

  But I didn’t listen to common sense as I turned around and looked at them, took a step forward, then another. I stared at each one in the fucking eye, saw as their laughter died down, as their smiles faded. One of them swallowed roughly and shifted on his feet, the others looking between one another. And still, I said nothing.

  Let one of them say one more goddamn thing. Just one more thing.

  And as we stood there in silence, me eyeing each one up and down, I knew shit was about to get real. This was the last thing I needed.

  The one I knew was named Braxton tightened his lips, and I knew he’d be the one to give me shit.

  “Boys, get to class,” a booming voice ricocheted off the walls, followed by the sound of heavy footsteps coming closer.

  I glanced to my side to see a teacher making his way toward us, his brown loafers clacking against the tiled floor. He held a brown worn satchel over his shoulders and pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose.

  “Come on, guys,” one of the jocks said, and after a suspended moment, they all headed in the other direction.

  But I didn’t miss how Braxton looked over his shoulder at me, the grin he sported a whole lot on the asshole side.

  Yeah, he wasn’t smart
like his buddies. He wanted to go toe-to-toe with me; that was for damn sure.

  “Come on,” the teacher said to me, tilting his head toward the stairs.

  I made a low sound of irritation and headed to class, and although I wanted to beat their asses, put them in their place, I was thankful we’d been stopped. I had to graduate, not just for myself but for my mother. She deserved to see her only son get his high school diploma and make something out of his life, earn a good living so he could take care of her. She’d been doing that my entire life.

  It was my turn now.

  And that’s what I wanted to do. Because the truth was, I didn’t have much else going for me.

  Chapter Three

  Harlow

  I’d been sitting on one of the chairs off to the side in the common area, a little outcropping hiding me, but I’d seen the interaction between Braxton and his friends and Aiden. I felt the cold air come from Aiden even from this distance. If they hadn’t been stopped by the teacher, I had no doubt there would’ve been a brutal fight that took place, and my money would’ve been on Aiden. He was bigger than any of the guys at school, not just taller but more muscular. He also looked like he didn’t give a shit about an outcome.

  And I knew that made someone dangerous.

  As I watched him go upstairs, I felt something shift inside me, this tingling starting in my hands and feet, spreading throughout my limbs, and settling in the center of my body. I was interested in him, curious. I wanted to know more about Aiden. I resolved to take that leap and talk to him, to find out who he was, what he liked and disliked.