If You Were Mine Read online

  If You Were Mine

  Jenika Snow

  Contents

  Synopsis

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Epilogue One

  Epilogue Two

  Epilogue Three

  About the Author

  IF YOU WERE MINE

  By Jenika Snow

  www.JenikaSnow.com

  [email protected]

  Copyright © March 2020 by Jenika Snow

  First E-book Publication: July 2017

  Editor: Kayla Robichaux

  Cover Design: Designs by Dana

  ALL RIGHTS RESERVED: The unauthorized reproduction, transmission, or distribution of any part of this copyrighted work is illegal. Criminal copyright infringement is investigated by the FBI and is punishable by up to 5 years in federal prison and a fine of $250,000.

  This literary work is fiction. Any name, places, characters and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or establishments is solely coincidental.

  Please respect the author and do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials that would violate the author’s rights.

  Daisy

  I was just a servant to the royal family, a nobody in the grand scheme of things. But my heart belonged to Prince Lennon, the somewhat “black sheep” of the family. I didn’t care what others said or how his reputation for being less than caring about tradition followed him.

  I saw the same emptiness in him as I had in myself. I wanted to ease him, let him know we were meant to be together.

  But I would never be seen as anything more than the help.

  Even so, one day, I’d have the nerve to admit how I felt, even if it ended up blowing up in my face.

  Prince Lennon

  She thought I didn’t notice her, that she was just a royal servant.

  She was wrong.

  I didn’t care if it was frowned upon if royalty mixed with a commoner. I didn’t care what the tabloids or my family might say. I wanted Daisy more than I ever wanted anything or anyone before.

  Just being in her presence made the loneliness in me lessen, made me want her more than the jewels and riches that surrounded me. Being with Daisy would complete me, and I’d have her.

  I just needed to make her see we belonged together.

  Chapter One

  Daisy

  Prick.

  Arrogant.

  Asshole.

  All of those things and more had been said about Lennon, Prince of Hemingway Court and second in line for the throne. But I knew him, saw him daily... waited on him.

  Behind those blue eyes was a man who was lonely, a man who was missing something in his life. I didn't know what that was, but I wanted to help him, wanted to tell him he could talk to me.

  I just wanted him.

  I had a feeling he acted the way he did, because he was pushing people away, because he was hurting inside and didn't know how to deal with it.

  I saw it happen with my father before he left us.

  But I was just the help, a servant to the royal family. I served him food, cleaned his room, and knew that nothing would ever come of being with him. I’d always wanted him, but I knew I could never have him.

  It was my bittersweet reality.

  A commoner could never catch the eye of a prince. I was content with that—at least, I pretended to be.

  I grabbed the silver tray that held his breakfast and headed toward his room. I passed other servants, even the Duke and Duchess of Alansworth, who were here for a visit, and saw Princess Carolyn just barely slipping into her room for the “night.”

  My heart thundered and my hands shook. I curled my fingers tighter, harder into the silver tray, willing myself to be calm. I needed to at least appear that way, even if I didn't feel it on the inside.

  But being in Prince Lennon's presence always made me feel unsteady, always had my emotions rising to the top.

  I stopped in front of his bedroom door, feeling like my heart was going to burst through my chest. You’d think after being a royal servant for so many years I would have been able to control myself. But the truth was, I couldn't, not when it concerned Prince Lennon.

  I lifted my hand to give three sharp knocks before entering, but I stopped with my hand midair when I heard him shouting at someone on the other side of the door.

  “I told you that's not who I am. I don't care what the tabloids say, and I don't give a fuck what anybody thinks.”

  I brought my knuckles down on the door, three sharp taps once again, before gripping the handle and pushing it open. I immediately saw Lennon sitting on the edge of his massive bed, his hands tunneled into his short dark hair, his attention on the ground.

  I left the door open as I came in, not speaking to him, because I knew my place.

  I didn’t make eye contact either. “Good morning, Prince Lennon.” I set the tray down on the table off to the side, gave a slight bow, and turned to leave.

  “Daisy?”

  My entire body stilled, the blood rushed through my veins, pumping harder, faster. I turned around, keeping my hands behind my back, my posture stiff.

  “Your highness?” My throat was dry, tight.

  For long seconds, he didn’t say anything, just stared at me, watched me with this stoic expression. It made my heart beat erratically. I wanted to go to him, just wanted to admit how I felt, how I’ve felt for so long.

  Know your place.

  “Thank you,” he said, his voice low, deep.

  He kept staring at me, his blue eyes intent, almost knowing. I felt this chill race up my spine, and my entire body reacted just from that look.

  “You're welcome, Your Highness.” I forced myself to turn away, to leave the room, but I wanted to stay there. I wanted to have him keep looking at me, keep making me feel like I was special. My thinking was irrational, but it was unavoidable.

  I’d felt this way for years, and even if I was only twenty-two years old and a servant, the only thing I wanted was Lennon.

  But that was a fantasy, and I needed to realize my reality was far less glamorous

  Chapter Two

  Lennon

  She thought I didn't notice her or see the way her bright blue eyes were constantly locked on me.

  But I did notice her. I'd noticed her for a very long time but hadn't been man enough to actually tell her how I felt.

  Even if I was a prince, my life was far from ideal. I had my own emotions, my own doubts. I was lonely, even if people surrounded me constantly. This wasn't the life I wanted but was born into. The only saving grace was the fact that I wasn’t first in line for the throne. Thank God, my brother Ashton had to deal with that.

  There were whispers that there was something wrong with me, and maybe that was the reason for my melancholy attitude and lack of following my traditional upbringing, and those whispers were always splashed across the tabloids. This was how it had always been, how it would always be.

  My thoughts went back to Daisy, about how I did want her, even if my family probably wouldn't approve. She was a trusted employee, the royal staff, but that didn't mean my mother and father would say it was okay for me to be with a “commoner.”

  But I wasn't better than her. In fact, she was too good for me. She was light, bright, and always inquisitive. I, on the other hand, let my inner emoti
ons—and the fact that I had nothing and no one despite the riches that surrounded me—bring me drown.

  The very idea of Daisy by my side, of having her as mine, only mine, had this feeling of life washing through me. It made me hope that I didn't have to live this routine life, consuming me, making me think there was more than I had ever imagined.

  I wanted to break away, to live outside this traditional box.

  I just wanted to be with Daisy. And one way or another, I’d have her. I’d make her mine. And fuck anyone who tried to stop me.

  Chapter Three

  Daisy

  I took off my shoes, tossed them into the corner, and made my way to the couch. My home was small, just a one-bedroom apartment I shared with my cat. In all essences of the word, I was a loner, choosing to be that way.

  My parents were all but nonexistent in my life, and I had only a couple friends I would consider close. It suited me well enough to just be alone.

  Maybe that's why I felt like I knew Lennon so well, that I could relate to him. I felt like he and I were one and the same, that we shared this emptiness that could be filled by the other.

  But no matter how many thoughts I had, how many times I envisioned just going up to him and explaining how I felt, I knew the truth. I knew I could never be with him, that I could never actually admit my feelings.

  He and I were living in two different worlds, a whole solar system apart, and as much as I wanted to be okay with that, I never would be. It was hard seeing him every day, wanting someone I knew I could never possibly have.

  I made my way into the bathroom and turned the faucet on, filling the tub up with near-scalding water. The steam rose up, and as I put the lilac bubble bath in, the scent of flowers invaded my senses.

  Sure, I read the tabloids, knew what they said about Prince Lennon. They accused him of being the black sheep of the family, the one who didn't take royalty seriously, didn't understand that the crown was his life.

  But I knew better than anyone—maybe because I thought we were the same, on some level. There was nothing wrong with keeping to yourself, nothing wrong with wanting nothing to do with the spotlight.

  I’d been that way my whole life, never needed anyone but myself to be content and happy. But I wasn't happy anymore, and hadn't been since I first saw him. Since I first realized I wanted him in my life.

  Before I slipped into the tub, I heard my cell going off. I left the bathroom and went into my room to grab it. The number that flashed across my screen was from one of the other servants, Holly.

  “Hey,” I said and held the phone between my ear and shoulder, moving back into the bathroom and staring at the water as it filled up the tub.

  “Hey back to you.”

  I heard the clatter of pots and pans in the background and knew she was still at the palace.

  “Want to hit up a The Pub tonight?”

  “Really? You’re not tired after working all day?” I sure as hell was—or maybe I felt tired, because I had thought about Lennon constantly.

  “Sure, why not? I know you don't have anything else to do. And neither do I. Besides, getting a couple free drinks from drunken guys hitting on us isn't that bad, is it?”

  I heard the teasing in her voice. I had to admit, she had a point.

  Although I should've said no, that I’d rather stay in, the truth was, getting out of here and trying to lose myself in something that wasn’t thoughts of Lennon sounded like a realistic, smart move.

  “Come on, Daisy, just for a couple hours?”

  Holly was the only “friend” I had at the palace, but even that was a stretch. I'd say we were more acquaintances, and tonight was probably just two co-workers wanting to let loose. But I had nothing better to do, as she'd said.

  Yeah, what's the worst that could happen? But even after I thought that, I knew I should have kept my mind’s mouth shut.

  Those were famous last words, weren't they?

  Chapter Four

  Lennon

  I closed my bedroom door, my heart beating a little faster than normal, my hands curled into fists at my side. I overheard one of the servants speaking on the phone, asking Daisy if she wanted to go to The Pub tonight.

  The very thought of Daisy being around a bunch of drunken asshole pissed me off. Them trying to touch her, hit on her... take her to their bed for the night…. Yeah, it pissed me off, made me see red.

  Maybe I shouldn't have cared, shouldn't have been as upset as I was. She was free to do what she wanted.

  But the truth of the matter was, I wanted her so much I knew I couldn't stay back. I knew I wouldn't, couldn't stay away.

  So, even though it was smarter for me to keep my distance from Daisy, I wouldn’t. I couldn’t. She was my reality. I knew that without a doubt. I’d been a coward for not saying anything sooner.

  Forget anyone who thought they could stop me from being with her, from finally admitting how I felt.

  I didn’t care if it was frowned upon that she was a commoner and I was royalty. I didn't care what my parents would think, what the media would say, or how it would all be perceived. I knew what I wanted, and I wouldn’t stop until I had it.

  Daisy would be mine, whether she knew it or not.

  It was just a matter of making her see we belonged together, that rumors or accusations or the spotlight of a relationship with me wouldn't ruin her. I’d protect her, make sure she was always safe. And anyone who thought they could come after her would have to go through me.

  I walked over, grabbed my jacket and shoes, and put them on. It would be tricky getting out of the palace, especially if I didn't want an escort, which I didn't. But I had my ways of getting around all that.

  At the end of the day, there was nothing that would stop me from going to Daisy tonight.

  Chapter Five

  Lennon

  I walked into The Pub and pulled my ball cap down a little lower. At least I had been smart enough to grab it before I left my room, and I wondered if it was even necessary. Would anybody even recognize me here, since they were probably drunk as fuck?

  The music was blaring, the voices loud. It was clear enough that everybody was getting good and plastered, so the chance that they would even know who I was in their inebriated state was pretty slim.

  I made my way to the side, dodging people who were grinding up against each other, others who were acting rowdy as hell, and scanned the pub to see if I could spot Daisy.

  Someone knocked into me and apologized, but I kept moving, kept scanning the interior, trying to see Daisy. Maybe she decided not to come out tonight. That thought had the possessiveness in me dimming slightly. I’d want her at home and safe, not around a bunch of assholes.

  But then I saw her, sitting at one of the tables with a girl. She had a beer in front of her, the glass only half full, her focus on it.

  My heart stilled just a little bit but then doubled in speed. That need I had for her rose up, this vicious beast inside me. I didn’t know what happened to me in the time between breakfast and now, but I was done waiting, done caring what anyone thought.

  I had absolutely no plan for what I was going to say or do tonight. Maybe I would just stay in the background and watch over her, protect her. And then when she headed back to the palace, or to her apartment, I could be honest with her then.

  I leaned against the wall and just watched her, my focus solely on her, my need for Daisy growing by the second. It was as if something broke inside me, this dam crushing, my emotions spilling out.

  It was as if when I finally realized, understood, I wouldn't hold myself back from her any longer, then this vicious beast rose up in me. I hoped she’d feel the same when I did admit how I felt.

  And then I saw her stand and head over to the back hallway. I assumed she was going to the restroom. I straightened, pushing off the wall and walking to where she was headed.

  I really didn't want to talk to her about any of this in a pub, but I also didn't want to seem like an asshole for k
nowing where she was and following her here just to talk to her.

  But speaking with Daisy about my feelings while she was wearing the wait-staff uniform and bringing me breakfast seemed grossly out of place. I wanted us on the same level, even though I already felt like we were.

  I positioned myself so I could still see the hallway where the bathroom was and figured I’d talk to her when she came out. I’d explain I needed to speak with her about something important. Not the way I wanted to go about this, but I was tired of waiting.

  And when she finally came out, my entire body stiffened, my heart raced, and every part of me wanted to go to her in that moment. She had her head down, glancing at her phone, and she never looked more beautiful.

  I saw some asshole come up to her, all but blocking her way. She glanced up, seeming startled. She smiled, but I could tell it was uncomfortable, maybe even a little nervous. Whatever he was saying, she shook her head, the smile still in place but looking more forced by the second. And when he reached out and started playing with the tendril of her hair, I could see the discomfort in her face rising.

  Something in me snapped, this beast being unleashed, tearing right through the cage I apparently had it housed in deep within me. I felt myself getting closer to her, my legs moving swiftly, my body propelling toward the threat I saw.